#218 - radical apartmemt

well i guess i've been busy cause i haven't been posting lately. sorry to the one or two people who read this! haha at least you can look on facebook and see what i've been eating. i've actually been really busy with work mostly. also i went home for a quick trip to visit my grandpa who is in a nursing facility now. then i moved.

WORK
i'm working primarily as a "medicine nurse" right now...aka "drug dealer". i am passing meds to the forty-plus people in the facility. its getting busier with new admissions and everyone has tons of meds. when i'm old i say no more than five a day! some people take like 50 pills. i'm not even exaggerating. its pretty sad. its not really nursing but its the only position they have open right now. i was able to be the "treatment nurse" one day when they needed someone to cover it. that was awesome cause i felt like a real nurse, but at the same time it was kind of boring because there weren't many treatments. i don't really know what i want to do but it probably is not either one. the other position is the "charge nurse" who basically answers the phone a lot and does tons of paperwork. definitely not my jam. so right now i am just working to pay the bills and thinking about what i really want to do.

MAUI
i went to maui for five days i think, it was pretty short. my grandpa had pneumonia, not sure if its gone now but he is getting weaker and not eating much. he was sleeping a lot and not opening his eyes, even when he was eating! it was really good to see him and spend time with him. we were all kind of realizing that he may not make it to my sister's wedding next year. that's really sad but i guess that's reality. she was able to come over to maui and so were my parents. so all four of us were there, which was really nice. i was there for father's day so we all went to IHOP. basically we'd go see my grandpa at the facility two or three time a day and help him eat or push him around in the wheelchair. he likes to get up and then 5 minutes later want to lay down. so it was pretty challenging to be patient. it was weird to be on the family side of things. having to ask the nurses and CNAs for help with things and being patient. i know how much work they have to do so it was weird to have to be the one to wait.

MOVE
just moved in with my bf, we got this two bedroom apt not too far from where i was. it's pretty awesome, close to the best coffee shop, a theater, whole foods, great food and a beautiful park. it's way closer to his work so that's nice. my work is still about 4 miles away and its an uphill bike ride but thankfully i don't have to do that everyday. the weather is finally getting to be nice. the apartment itself is nothing too fancy. its on the second floor, carpet, pretty spacious and nice windows/light. its got a dishwasher and lots of closets. we are still putting it together and there is crap everywhere but it's great. we put up some of his art on the walls and slowly its starting to feel like home! :) the move itself was pretty grueling. got a u-haul one day and had to move our two places. got a couple friends to help but it was hot and we had to keep going up and down stairs. UGH! but it was all worth it. we have an extra bedroom so everyone is welcome to come visit! pictures to come soon...

#207 - christmas and stuff

this was a new kind of christmas because i am not really sure when i last missed christmas in hawaii. since i am job searching and wanted to be available during the holidays i went home for thanksgiving. that went great and i had a good time. i did everything i wanted to but it was pretty short. two weeks goes by quickly, especially when you are filling it with surfing, manapuas, fried rice, football games, costco, loco mocos, and shave ice.

i never really felt like it was christmas in the weeks leading up to it. i really didn't do well on christmas gifts and i kind of didn't care. i have something in mind that i am working on but i never got around to it in time. my family knows i don't have much money so i am sure they understand my giftlessness but someday i just want to get it together enough to be on time with good, thoughtful, loving gifts for the fam. maybe next year.

my plans for christmas ended up being driving down to coos bay to spend time with jeremy and his family. the drive on christmas eve was long (4 hours) and we left after he got off work around 7. i met his whole family previously, but on separate occasions. i was excited because they all seemed really fun. we got there late and hung out for a little while but were pretty worn out. christmas morning was spent sleeping in then having a leisurely brunch. we went out to the beach and the weather was so perfect. they said i was lucky because it was one out of maybe five days of sun all year. supposedly its really cold, windy and rainy all the time. not for me, it was gorgeous and even warmer than portland. after that we opened presents and had dinner. we watched some old family videos which were really precious! to end the night we went to shore acres, which is a botanical garden with an awesome light display. there were millions of lights covering plants there but since we went so late it closed shortly after we arrived. the whole day was really nice and relaxed. the fam was really entertaining and fun.

so up next is new years eve i guess. blog recap of 2009 to come shortly and perhaps what i am looking forward to in 2010. the days are winding down for this year. it's been good.

#205 - thanksgiving trip

i'm not sure when the last time was that i was home for thanksgiving. maybe 2003 after i graduated from college? it's been awhile. in less than 24 hours i will be on a plane to hawaii, my boarding pass is printed and i am (not) packed. with the new baggage policy i will be just bringing a carryon. i don't need much anyway, swimsuit, some t-shirts and shorts, and slippers. what else would i need? i am gonna try to workout everyday since a lot of people will be busy during the day with things like work. other than that i have a few plans.

tuesday
arrive around noon
lunch with mom

wednesday
beach?
dinner with friends

thursday
thanksgiving!
brunch with family

friday
surfing?
mom's b-day dinner @ ige's

saturday
sister time?
UH football tailgate and game - go warriors!

sunday
golfing maybe?
tennis at night?

monday
beach?

tuesday
golfing with dad?
flight to maui

so i am trying to get in a lot of sun while i am there, store up some vitamin D. haven't been in strong sun in awhile. i have my oregon tan right now. all my plans with ?s are up in the air but strong possibilities. i haven't been working too hard on making plans because i know they will come together without me. things always workout in the end. i am looking forward to lots of things like seeing friends/family, surfing, golfing and eating. some foods on my list are big city diner, mililani golf course, loco mocos and ramen. also tokyo tei in maui! i am getting hungry just thinking about all this. so because of all this eating i need to be hitting the gym or beach everyday. if not, the plane won't be able to take off because of too much weight. hahaha

i always fill up my time in hawaii with lots of things so it goes by really fast. in no time i will be back here so i want to just make the best of it. i have been posting a lot about oregon state football but it is real now. we are playing the civil war on december 3 at autzen stadium. it's the biggest one of them all, and i am not just saying that. whoever wins goes to the rose bowl! the granddaddy of them all! it has been quite the season and we are just getting better. we have a little over a week to prepare and it is on!! i am so excited but unfortunately i'll be away from the state of oregon. not to worry though, i am bringing a lot of OSU paraphanelia and t-shirts. i will be representing and watching it wherever i can. hopefully with oregon state fans present.

see you all soon.

#189 - JUNE

i haven't written anything in a month! i've been busy and i promise there was some excitement. first of all, i finished school and graduated! yeehaw now i am waiting to take my NCLEX, the national board exam for nursing. after i pass that i will be a RN. my parents, sister and uncle all came up from hawaii to visit and participate in my graduation ceremony. it was awesome. unfortunately, no pictures of graduation yet. sorry.

my big june event was a trip to alaska on a cruise ship! it was my first cruise and while maybe not the last, i don't think i'll be going on another anytime soon. it was a lot to take in, for sure. especially when it came to eating. most of the meals are included in the price, unless you want a fancier meal, then it is $10-$25 set price. we ate a lot at the market cafe, which was buffet style. towards the end we started eating more in the restaurants but you could still order as many appetizers and stuff that you wanted. it was a lot of eating, what we are really good at!

it was cool cause i got to spend a lot of time with my sister, who i miss a lot. we get along fantastically. i also spent a lot of time with my parents. it was nice but a little cramped. we all shared one room and i slept on a bunk! it was interesting and i wish we had two rooms. it would have been a lot more expensive tho i think. there was a lot to do on the ship, a lot of which i did not partake in - crazy dance parties, a pool and hot tubs, casino, bingo (played once). we did go to all the night time shows though, with the jean ann ryan company. they did 3 shows - andrew lloyd webber tribute, cirque pacific, and "band on the run" 70's. it was really neat and we saw the chinese all-star acrobats, which was badass! another awesome thing was the magic show! shawn farquar is a two time world magic champion and he was awesome! here is one of his best card tricks, it's amazing!


we did four different outings off the ship in different ports of call. one of the best was the glacier day. we went to see mendenhall glacier by taking a bus ride from juneau. the glacier was cool but it was far away, i thought we'd get closer but i suppose it is better if people stay far away from them.i also wanted to see the glacier calving, which is when big chunks fall off. but we did not get to see that unfortunately. too bad, but what we did see was maybe even better...a BEAR! it was a baby i think and who knows where the mother was. i was standing at a lookout trying to get a picture of the glacier when i look down and there is a bear! i said "oh my god!" and screamed like a girl. that probably wasn't the best idea but that's what happened. the bear didn't even notice me or the other people around. he was 10-15 feet away from me, only a 3-foot cement wall separating us. oh man it was scary!after that experience nothing was going to be awesome so we got back on the ship and went on our merry way. the plan was to go see sawyer glacier but for whatever reason it was not accessible, so we went up a different fjord and set sail for dawes glacier. it took over 2 hours and everytime there was a little bend in the road we thought it would be around the corner! it took forever and the scenery didn't change much. it was cold and rainy and we were standing on the bow so all the wind was going right into our frozen faces. it was pretty spectacular though.we also had stops in ketchikan, skagway and prince rupert, canada. we went on a scenic train ride in the yukon area and learned about the gold rush. basically there was gold in alaska and so a bunch of men went there to get some. what do a bunch of men need? a bunch of women. so in every gold rush town there were lots of brothels. we went on a tour of one...that's all i remember about skagway. my sister and i nicknamed it "skankway". and if you get a chance to go to prince rupert, canada - don't. there is nothing there! we're still not sure why we stopped there. so that was my trip.

now i am back in portland, studying for my exam and moving (again!). also i have to look for a RN job and start working. yikes! for all those who have been hounding me for a picture of my bf, here is one of me and jeremy at a park. we had just finished a big meal of sushi and were hanging out in the sun.

#172 - kids

kids are interesting. this morning, on my way to school, there was a cute little indian boy on the bus. he was sitting on the seat in front of me with his mom, who only spoke indian. he was probably about 2ish and kept looking at me. i smiled and then we proceeded to play peek-a-boo for about 10 minutes. it was pure, unadulterated fun. simple and pure. he made me smile! it was a nice way to start the day. it's funny how kids can play peek-a-boo so long, or even hide-and-seek. i once played hide-and-seek for 2 hours non-stop. it was exhausting! i guess peek-a-boo crosses cultural lines as well. anyway, it was cute.

i always assumed i would have kids. my parents were 24 and 25 when they had me, so obviously i'm older than they were. i can't even imagine having kids at that age. i'm definitely not ready now yet. i go back and forth on wanting kids almost everyday so by that comment i'm definitely not ready. a lot of people don't think about these things. i mean that lady that had octuplets...crazy. she already had 6 kids and is on federal aid (not that there is anything wrong with that..). she doesn't work and i've heard is going to lose her house. you already have 6 kids then go through in vitro to have 8 more?! what is wrong with this lady? i know there are religions that do not allow contraception but obviously this was not a religious thing. the way i see it, each parent only has so much time and energy. so say you have 2 parents. you can only fully give one kid your whole energy at a time, so that means 2 kids at most. my parents only had 2 kids, it was enough i think. we each got attention, even though i tried to get more for myself. (it's a leo thing)

mostly i want my sister to have kids soon. i want to be an aunty! then i can play with the kids and dress them up, spoil them and not have to raise them. i would definitely need to be closer to her when she has them. of course she is not married yet so it's probably not going to happen that soon. my grandma has been telling both of us we don't need to get married before having kids, cause she wants us to have them soon while she's still around. i laugh everytime she says this, it's a very un-grandma like thing to say, especially since she's pretty conservative. of course i want to make my grandma happy but not at the expense of my life. once you have kids, your independent adult life is over, as you know it. it's the biggest commitment you could ever make. i'm not against commitment but this is huge. parents have so much influence over the outcome of the kids' lives. sometimes they don't realize how much. although my upbringing was not bad, i can attribute a lot of things to things that happened or did not happen. although i have grandiose ideas that i would be the best parent ever, it's not a good idea yet. i want to be a little more stable myself.

what a weird post that is all over the place. that's my mind today.

#161 - christmas!

i know it's not really about the presents but christmas kind of tends to focus around presents. you wake up and all you can think is, "i wonder if i got any good presents?!" unfortunately with the new airline baggage restrictions, i can't really enjoy any big presents cause i'd have to lug them back with me and pay for them. i did not really get anything to write about. i don't actually expect good presents, never have and never will. i already got something i really wanted anyway, and that was a gym membership. i think at this point in your life, as adults, you already buy the things you need and want. or at least i do. i did get $25 to the mall so i'll have to use that before i leave. hopefully there will be some awesome sales!

we had a christmas party at night, which is more of what the day means. you hang out with family, eat a lot, and play games. we played bingo. i won $4! haha it was fun but i passed out before 10. i've been sleeping weird lately. i sleep by my grandpa who needs help to the bathroom so i have been sleeping lightly at night so that i can hear him. so i wake up to take him to the toilet and it takes awhile to get back to sleep. i then wake up early because everyone else does. there are ten people in this house that was probably built for 5. it's a small house.

we've been playing lots of games - scrabble, dominoes, and cards. i love scrabble, it's fun! i'm a nerd. i've been playing wii. my favorite games i lego star wars and i'm working on it right now, started last year and am just continuing it till i can finish, hopefully. i'm almost halfway i think. my sister got an "outdoor adventure" wii game that we played, it has a running pad like on the old nintendo. my cousin's fiancee has an iphone and had a ton of old nintendo games on it! i played some duck hunt!! gotta love the classics.

we went to lahaina today, which wasn't too exciting. we ate at cheeseburger in paradise MMMM and walked around art shops. it's hard to do stuff with ten people. everyone has to agree and people walk at different paces. while i don't want to abandon my family, it would be good to go do my own thing at some point. i've got a few more days here then it's back to my regular life/schedule. it will be a welcome change but i'm gonna enjoy the fam and islands for the rest of the time i'm here.

oh, the hawaii bowl did not turn out well for us. i went to the game, cheered as hard as i could, and still yet - notre dame 49, hawaii 21. boo!! i guess you can't win em all. but...i have a chance for redemption. sun bowl on the 31st, oregon state vs pitt. our top two players, the rodgers brothers, are out with injuries. althought that's no excuse for potential poor play, it sucks cause they are fun to watch. i am just gonna cheer and hope our team steps up. pitt is a pretty good, competitive, talented team. we definitely have to show up and play way better than in the civil war. that was embarassing. GO BEAVERS!

#93 - nikita

my dog nikita is the smartest one i know. he can do all these different tricks, or at least used to. we got him on easter, 14 or 15 years ago from my mom's friend out in nanakuli. we went there to see her litter or 5 or so baby chihuahua-terriers. we were playing with them and they were so cute! i really liked the runt. after an hour or so of playing, my mom said "this one is yours!", giving us a cute little white puppy (not the runt). reina and i were so surprised and excited! we had never had a dog before and this one was so cute! he was a total puppy with so much energy. we didn't know much about taking care of him but we immediately loved everything about him. that night i slept with him on the floor of the bathroom. i'm sure he was scared so i cuddled him close to me. i named him after a character in a movie starring one of my favorite actors, river phoenix. he was the son of kgb agent parents and his name was nikita. i thought it was a great name and he seemed to like it too.

through the years he learned many tricks. he was a very well behaved dog, even though in those puppy years he was crazy and ran through the house a lot. he chewed things. he ate things. he ruined things. he ruined me, for the better. even though he was the one we had to feed, bathe, walk and take care of, he was the one who took care of us. when i had a problem or issue i would talk to niki. he always listened and no matter what he would give you kisses. he loved going places, especially maui, where he has been for the past several years. he and my grandpa spent a lot of time together. they would sit out in the yard under the cherry tree and just hang out. when my grandpa had a stroke he said niki acted strange. he knew what was happening i think. even so, niki was there for him. my grandpa got better and niki was there for my uncle and grandma as well. he was always there, waiting for you to come home, wagging his tail and waiting for butt scratches. he LOVED it.

we found out last year that he had a heart murmur, which is pretty common in chihuahuas apparently. they weren't too concerned about it and told us a couple things to look for: mostly getting tired quicker and short of breath. well it's come to that point. he kind of stopped eating, so the vet said to feed him anything that he WILL eat. the other day that was part of a manapua! yum. he's been short of breath and just acting different. my mom went over to maui to take him to the vet and they took an xray and gave him a shot. he's got congestive heart failure and i think some fluid in his lungs. the shot made him a little better but it's clear that he won't get too much better. the last time i was home and saw niki was february when i went home for a funeral. i've been saying bye to niki for a couple trips now but this time i knew it probably was the last. he's been getting deaf and blind for awhile and slowing down. i guess it happens when you are 90 or so. he was still very happy and loved his butt scratches. i did a lot of yard work and niki would just sit and watch me. my last project was painting this house for him. my grandparents bought this new recliner and it came in this big box. so i added some pizzazz to it. niki loved it and kept sitting by it. he's always so smiley in his pictures and i'm glad he's happy. he's made our family happier and when the time comes, as i know it will, we will only have pictures and memories (and the big box).

my mom talked to the vet about when to know to put him down and stuff like that. when it comes to the point where he's in too much pain or can't enjoy life, it's time to think about it. although he was having trouble breathing, he still seems to have life. he was wagging his tail. it's so hard not to be there to cuddle him again like i did that first night on the bathroom floor. he must know his time will come eventually. i really hope he goes in his sleep, i don't want my mom to have to make that decision ever. she's been through a lot of deaths in the past few months and this hopefully will be the last for awhile. he's had a great long life and so when the time comes, it comes. i've said my goodbye and gave him kisses. what more can you do?