#194 - vegetarian, again

don't get me wrong, i love meat. i don't need it though and right now my body wants me to be vegetarian! it's been a long time coming and i've thrown the idea for a few months now. i have no aversion to tofu, tempeh, seitan and other non-meat substances. for that, i am lucky i guess. eventually i want to get to being vegan but that is quite a jump for now. so i'm in the transition period. i don't want to waste food so i'm gonna eat up or give away whatever i have in my fridge/freezer.

there are many reasons for me wanting to live the vegan life. i'm not trying to be preachy but sometimes when i read posts about becoming veg that's what it sounds like. this is just me and how i feel. so if you'll be offended, stop reading, i'm not trying to convert you.

reason #1 - health
my family has a history of high cholesterol and i know that when i eat meat it goes up and when i don't, it goes down. this is a fact cause i've tried it. i've not been veg for a few years now so i'm sure it's up over 200, which is "high". there are so many things associated with high cholesterol and i'm young so i want to avoid them. i also don't want to get on any kind of medications for this like my whole family. the less pharmaceuticals i need to take, the better. when i am veg i am more conscious of what i am eating, and will gravitate towards fresh fruits and vegetables. i don't have to worry about saturated fats or cholesterol, which is not found in plant products. a meat-based diet leads to heart disease, cancer and other icky diseases.

reason #2 - animals
i don't want this to become an animal rights blog but i watched this show called "earthlings" which was narrated by joaquin phoenix (world famous actor and now rapper). it talks about all the ways in which animals are used by humans. also that using animals is like any other kind of -ism. it's an interesting documentary. i've seen a lot of other vids and read lots of other books on the subject. the majority of meat, eggs, dairy and other animal products are from animals who lead a terrible and horrifying life. they are in cramped quarters and do not live on a "farm". many times they live in concrete buildings. the ways in which they are slaughtered are a whole nother thing. yuck. enough about animals.

reason #3 - environment
living in oregon i am very conscious of environmental issues. everyone drives a prius, everything is recycled and there are tree hugging hippies here. i'm not about to chain myself to a tree anytime soon but i do appreciate what we have here on earth. i see how it is fading and the future generations will have nothing but muck. muckety muck. how does eating a vegan diet help the environment?! in many ways. growing grain to feed the animals instead of feeding humans is a waste of resources. rainforests are being cut down to create grazing land for cattle. the water supply is not only used mindlessly by the industry but is also being polluted by animal waste. another thing is that the world is not prepared to have all its people eating a meat-based diet. it is not sustainable but more and more are trying to follow the SAD (standard american diet).

reason #4 - spiritual
i have been thinking a lot about living a more conscious life and with that comes the idea of karma and nonviolence. i grew up without religion really so i love to study it. in this great world i am only one little piece so why should i matter more than other beings? it's not that i don't believe i am worthy, it's that i have respect for others. the animals were killed so that i could enjoy a steak or what have you. they were in pain. when i think about that, i don't want to eat meat. they say that if slaughter houses were made of glass or you had to kill your own animals, most people would be vegetarian.

reason #5 - you don't really need meat
the first thing people think about is protein, which is easily attainable on a vegetarian diet. you get the protein without saturated fats and cholesterol. most americans eat too much protein anyway. if you are worried about protein, eat more beans! most other vitamins and minerals are found primarily in plant foods. all except vitamin b-12, which can be easily supplemented. fruit and veggies are where it's at.

reason #6 - obesity
i am definitely not doing this to lose weight nor do i think i am fat/obese. this is a good reason though. although it's not one of my reasons, eating a good, balanced vegan diet has a side effect of losing weight. obesity is an epidemic in this country, just look around you. fat people everywhere. what else do we have a lot of? fast food joints.. they are correlated people! obesity is linked to lots of bad stuff (see reason #1). i've read that 1 in 3 children are considered obese. they have crazy metabolisms and should not be obese but they eat crap and sit around all day. it's scary.

ok that's more than enough reasons for now. some people eat meat for every meal, every day. if they were to just skip one of those meals and replace it with a vegetarian one, it would still be beneficial. you have to start somewhere. it may be challenging to change your ways but you can do it. now is the part where i actually recommend trying to eat less meat. this would mostly go under the health reason because really it is dangerous. there are more and more young people with clogged arteries ending up on my cardiac floor. gross. try going veg for a day. i challenge you!

#193 - two wolves

my mom sent this to me in an e-mail. very interesting.

Two Wolves
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside all people. He said, 'My son, the battle is between two 'wolves' inside us all.

One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.'

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: 'Which wolf wins?'

The old Cherokee simply replied, 'The one you feed.'

i really like this story. it is simple but very true. it is all about your outlook and attitude. i definitely want the Good wolf to win in me. i do not have much more to say on it but just wanted to pass it along without filling your inbox with junkmail.

#192 - new dog

sadly, i don't think i am getting the dog. while i would love to take care of a puppy, i think it might just be too sudden. i have been thinking about her for a couple weeks now but at this point i do not yet have a full time job. so i'd have lots of time to train her, but no money to feed her. i wouldn't want to starve the little girl. it is likely that i will be working 12-hour shifts and with a 30-60 minute commute each way that could potentially be 14 hours away, three times a week. that's not fair to the puppy.

i have been watching my friend's two dogs here at the coast. they are a handful but are house broken and past the puppy stage. they sleep with me and cuddle all i want. i'm getting a huge dose of doggy love. maybe this is all i need for awhile. the playing without the responsibility. sure, i am taking care of them and responsible enough that they don't get hurt or stolen. i am even feeding them everyday. they are easy enough.

having a dog means being tied down. i would have to either bring it with me or get home everyday. sometimes things come up and i am away all day. that is not fair to a young puppy. also if i am to travel anytime soon (and hopefully i am) i would have to find someone to care for her. although i have a lot of people probably willing to do so, i'd hate to do it.

my current living situation is a temporary one. i am basically house sitting while cleaning it to be rented/sold. so the puppy would get used to the house and we'd have to move again in the fall. tortuous. also i'd have to pay for cleaning and deposits, which i am not too keen on. i want to wait for a more permanent place.

all these things point to "no" yet i am still torn. i am still going to meet her on friday even though i am about 90% sure. she deserves a look-see.

#191 - brandi RN

i did it, i passed my NCLEX. whoo hoo!! party time!! wait, actually this means now i have to look for and find a job, and then start working. oh bollocks! it's not that i don't want or need a job, i really do. it's more that i will probably start working full time and not have any time or energy for other things. i want to be paid for sitting at home and doing nothing, or going to the gym, or grocery shopping and cooking, or traveling. these are exciting ideas for jobs. if anyone knows of jobs like these, let me know.

in all seriousness though, i am excited to be done and officially a nurse! woot! i do want to meet and help people, it's cool. nursing is a fun and interesting profession, i am stoked. new job, new scrubs, new co-workers, new boss, new patients, new money, new house, new dog. ahem, yes, i said dog. this does not have anything to do with nursing but i have the opportunity to get a dog, less than one year old so i guess a PUPPY!! she is a chihuahua (of course) and not trained yet so i have to do that. a family wants to give her up because i guess she is a handful, DUH she is a puppy! if all goes well i will get her in about a week and then start training her. i am not sure when i will be training for my temporary job (at the nursing home where i've worked as a CNA) but i know i will have lots of time to hang out and train the puppy dog. WOOF!! her name is "little bit" which i will definitely change. she is tan colored and adorable. any suggestions for names? i was thinking lolita or bella (haha twilight!). i haven't actually met her yet so maybe i will wait till then. i've never had a girl dog before or trained a puppy by myself. research begins.

#190 - cat sitting

i find this hilarious and i know a few who will too. i am cat sitting!! there are no dogs involved. since when do i take care of cats?! this is very strange. so far i play with the cat, feed it, give it water, medication, and even empty the kitty litter. OMG this is weird. now don't get too excited, i'm not gonna go out and get a cat just yet. while they are easy to care for and interesting creatures, i am still a dog person. i want a dog, specifically a chihuahua. but this is not about dogs.

the cat KAI is old and has hyperthoroidism so he gets a pill twice a day, which i have to sit and hold him while i pry his mouth (with sharp teeth) open and shove this pill-giving syringe to the back of his throat and pop it in. it's dangerous! he is not an aggressive cat but i am still wary of his teeth and claws. rawr.

in other news, the new house i just moved into has a cat also. it is a reclusive little thing and no one has seen it in weeks. they put food and water out for it and it poos so it has to be there, but no one sees it. strange but true. so while i won't be really caring for this cat, i will be living with it. i will be the one to refill his/her food/water and do the litter thing maybe. yuck, that is so disgusting! oh yeah, i moved again. this time to a place a little farther out but am living there for a few months until we can clean it up. it is my friend's grandma's house and she is living in assisted living but has this gigantic house with tons of stuff. so in exchange for a place to live, i am helping go through the stuff and put it into boxes for goodwill or the trash.

these are things i need to do with my own stuff. i tried and got a few boxes to give away but i still moved 2 1/2 truckloads. one was my bed so not too bad but still, i think i had like 40 boxes/items. maybe 4-5 was food, 4-5 was clothes, 2 kitchen stuff, a couple office boxes, bedroom, bathroom, oh and 3 boxes of books. i have a box of textbooks that i probably will never look at again. i sold some but why do i keep the others? i did recycle a lot of paperwork and other random junk i was keeping. i just feel so weighed down by my things. my goal is that the next time i move it is only 1 truckload of stuff plus my bed. too much stuff!!!

#189 - JUNE

i haven't written anything in a month! i've been busy and i promise there was some excitement. first of all, i finished school and graduated! yeehaw now i am waiting to take my NCLEX, the national board exam for nursing. after i pass that i will be a RN. my parents, sister and uncle all came up from hawaii to visit and participate in my graduation ceremony. it was awesome. unfortunately, no pictures of graduation yet. sorry.

my big june event was a trip to alaska on a cruise ship! it was my first cruise and while maybe not the last, i don't think i'll be going on another anytime soon. it was a lot to take in, for sure. especially when it came to eating. most of the meals are included in the price, unless you want a fancier meal, then it is $10-$25 set price. we ate a lot at the market cafe, which was buffet style. towards the end we started eating more in the restaurants but you could still order as many appetizers and stuff that you wanted. it was a lot of eating, what we are really good at!

it was cool cause i got to spend a lot of time with my sister, who i miss a lot. we get along fantastically. i also spent a lot of time with my parents. it was nice but a little cramped. we all shared one room and i slept on a bunk! it was interesting and i wish we had two rooms. it would have been a lot more expensive tho i think. there was a lot to do on the ship, a lot of which i did not partake in - crazy dance parties, a pool and hot tubs, casino, bingo (played once). we did go to all the night time shows though, with the jean ann ryan company. they did 3 shows - andrew lloyd webber tribute, cirque pacific, and "band on the run" 70's. it was really neat and we saw the chinese all-star acrobats, which was badass! another awesome thing was the magic show! shawn farquar is a two time world magic champion and he was awesome! here is one of his best card tricks, it's amazing!


we did four different outings off the ship in different ports of call. one of the best was the glacier day. we went to see mendenhall glacier by taking a bus ride from juneau. the glacier was cool but it was far away, i thought we'd get closer but i suppose it is better if people stay far away from them.i also wanted to see the glacier calving, which is when big chunks fall off. but we did not get to see that unfortunately. too bad, but what we did see was maybe even better...a BEAR! it was a baby i think and who knows where the mother was. i was standing at a lookout trying to get a picture of the glacier when i look down and there is a bear! i said "oh my god!" and screamed like a girl. that probably wasn't the best idea but that's what happened. the bear didn't even notice me or the other people around. he was 10-15 feet away from me, only a 3-foot cement wall separating us. oh man it was scary!after that experience nothing was going to be awesome so we got back on the ship and went on our merry way. the plan was to go see sawyer glacier but for whatever reason it was not accessible, so we went up a different fjord and set sail for dawes glacier. it took over 2 hours and everytime there was a little bend in the road we thought it would be around the corner! it took forever and the scenery didn't change much. it was cold and rainy and we were standing on the bow so all the wind was going right into our frozen faces. it was pretty spectacular though.we also had stops in ketchikan, skagway and prince rupert, canada. we went on a scenic train ride in the yukon area and learned about the gold rush. basically there was gold in alaska and so a bunch of men went there to get some. what do a bunch of men need? a bunch of women. so in every gold rush town there were lots of brothels. we went on a tour of one...that's all i remember about skagway. my sister and i nicknamed it "skankway". and if you get a chance to go to prince rupert, canada - don't. there is nothing there! we're still not sure why we stopped there. so that was my trip.

now i am back in portland, studying for my exam and moving (again!). also i have to look for a RN job and start working. yikes! for all those who have been hounding me for a picture of my bf, here is one of me and jeremy at a park. we had just finished a big meal of sushi and were hanging out in the sun.